Random Quantum Sock Theory
Anti-Nukes / Beavers / Dinosaurs / Earth Rotation / Nonexistent Universe / Flat Earth / Gelatinous / Hippophants / Integrification / Manatees / Omega Minus / Quantum Socks / Small World / String / Tetrahedra / TOEs
Welcome to the
theory about why the earth rotates.
This theory is, basically, that the earth spins because there is a giant blue marmoset that spins it.
( marmoset ˈmɑːməˌsɛtʰ, n a very small American monkey with a long hairy tail and furry tufts on its ears. [Fr. marmouset grotesque figure]
according to The Chambers Dictionary.)
The marmoset can survive space because he has an oxygen tank on his back, and "mini minion marmosets" that get more oxygen from the Earth. He can survive for ever because he has the secret of the Elixir of Life, and he can keep up with the Earth as it moves around the sun, because he has a jetpack on his back (as well as the oxygen tank).
No-one's noticed the giant marmoset because he stays on the dark side of the earth, facing away from the sun, where it's too dark to see him. The night sky is actually his face, apparently. The stars are freckles, the moon appears to get bigger and smaller (waxing and waning) when his finger gets in the way, with no finger leading to a full moon, a bit of finger leading to a half moon or crescent moon, and all finger leading to a new moon.
Solar eclipses happen when he takes of the freckle and throws it, and lunar eclipses when the finger gets completely in the way.
The NASA moon landings, that seem to contradict this theory, actually never happened. It's a conspiracy! (See the Flat Earth Conspiracy Theory.)